Your 23-month-old is full of energy and loves to stay active. Her memory is improving, allowing her to connect ideas and places. She is eager to dress and undress herself and may enjoy playing dress-up. Her developing brain can handle simple puzzles, and she is capable of drawing curves, stacking blocks, and stringing chunky beads.
Physical Development
High Spirits
Your 23-month-old is constantly on the move: running, jumping, and spinning. All the fine and gross motor skills developed over the past two years are now coming together. It’s nearly impossible to keep your toddler still for long, making outings to restaurants, shops, or the post office challenging. However, this period is also delightful, as long as you have realistic expectations. Watching your toddler twirl, jump, and spin on the playground reveals pure joy.
What you can do: Provide ample opportunities for your toddler to expend energy. Local parks, children’s museums, or tumbling classes are excellent venues for letting your toddler be active. After a day filled with exercise, your child will likely sleep soundly.
If mealtimes have become chaotic, try feeding your toddler first while they sit in a small, low chair at a toddler-sized table. Offer a variety of easy-to-handle finger foods. Once your child is done eating, allow them to play while you enjoy your meal with the rest of the family.
Slimmer Body, Smoother Walking
Growth has slowed compared to the first year, with children tripling their birth weight by age one but gaining only 3 to 5 pounds in the second year. Your toddler now appears less like a baby, with upright posture, increased mobility, and melting baby fat.
Your toddler’s movement has also evolved. The earlier back-and-forth gait has become a smoother, more coordinated stride. By age two, most children can pull toys behind them, carry items while walking, and start running.
Dressing (and Undressing!)
Approaching the second birthday, your toddler can likely undress herself and put on some clothes. Loose-fitting T-shirts, jackets, and zippered pajamas are easiest to manage. Your child may enjoy playing dress-up, using hats, scarves, and bath towels for fun.
Other developments include bending from the waist to pick up items without squatting, standing on tiptoes, and attempting to jump with both feet off the ground. Be aware: your child may insist on navigating stairs without assistance.
What you can do: Choose outfits with minimal buttons, snaps, or clasps to facilitate dressing. Elastic-waist pants, pull-on tops, and Velcro shoes are ideal. Gradually introduce new challenges, like a single large button or snap.
Tiny Trikes
Watching your child pedal a tricycle or bicycle signifies growing independence. Age two is an excellent time to introduce these, especially if your child has mastered running and has good balance.
Besides traditional tricycles, there are scaled-down two-wheelers suitable for two-year-olds. Check the manufacturer’s height and inseam recommendations when shopping. Learning to pedal is the most challenging part, so choose low models to minimize tipping risks.
Stay nearby during initial attempts to help with spills. Some trikes feature a long, removable push bar for parental control, which can save your back. Ensure your child wears a helmet from the start to establish essential safety habits.
Language and Cognitive Development
Growing Vocabulary
Your 23-month-old can likely follow simple two-step commands, such as “Come here and sit down so I can tie your shoes.” She can probably say at least 20 words clearly, with many more that might be harder to understand. Her vocabulary will soon expand rapidly, making it difficult to keep track. At this stage, she may:
- Form two- to four-word sentences like “Bird fly high” or “Dog run out.”
- Follow simple instructions.
- Repeat songs or words heard in conversations.
- Recognize names of people, things, and body parts.
- Understand opposites, such as “big” and “little.”
- Use pronouns, though not always correctly (“Me do it” instead of “Jake do it,” but probably not “I do it”).
Reading to your child is one of the best ways to boost her language skills. While you may have focused on familiar stories until now, it’s a good time to introduce books with a variety of new words and ideas (such as a tiger in the jungle). Books with wordplay and rhymes help kids make connections between words. When reading, pause to ask her questions about the book (“What is the kitty doing? Where is the boy?”). Point at objects and give her a chance to name the ones she knows.
Memory and Play
Previously, when your child was an infant, out of sight meant out of mind. Now she can remember where she left her doll, even hours later. She can also connect real-life experiences, like seeing monkeys at the zoo, with pictures in a book.
You may notice that she can now correctly place several pieces in a shape sorter. Many toddlers at this age are also engaging in dramatic play, such as pretending to eat a plastic banana and telling you how yummy it is. Although elaborate fantasy play with stories and characters is still a few years away, these activities lay the foundation for it.
Provide your toddler with plenty of opportunities for “unstructured” play. For example, give her a set of blocks to build towers or trains, or a simple puzzle to complete. Props like toy telephones, grocery carts, toolboxes, and tea sets allow her to mimic adult behaviors.
Puzzles and Drawing
At 23 months, your toddler may have the cognitive and fine motor skills to complete a three- to six-piece jigsaw puzzle. She might also be able to draw circles (though they might not be smooth yet) and vertical and horizontal lines. See if she can build a tower of six or more blocks or string large wooden beads on a cord.
Provide opportunities for her to refine her finger and hand skills by scooping and pouring sand or birdseed, pouring water, and squeezing moldable compounds like Play-Doh or bread dough if you cook together. Have crayons and paints available for her to create art, and let her see you writing and drawing. Watch how she tries to imitate you.
Behavioral Health and Development
Birthday Plans
As your toddler’s birthday approaches, you might be considering how to celebrate. Many 2-year-olds enjoy the excitement of cake, candles, balloons, and presents, but they can also be easily overwhelmed by too much stimulation. This includes too many guests and excessive noise.
Successful birthday parties for 2-year-olds are typically small, simple, and brief. A good rule of thumb is to invite one child guest per year of age, so for a 2-year-old, invite two guests of similar age. A couple of hours is sufficient. Simple activities like blowing bubbles or swinging are still great fun for them. Schedule the party before the afternoon nap or at dinnertime, but wrap things up well before bedtime to avoid overstimulation.
If you plan a more ambitious party, keep your expectations low. Don’t expect the birthday child to be a gracious center of attention. Special features like clowns or magicians might frighten them, and they might not participate in games. There will be plenty of time for organized activities at parties when your child is older.
The Beloved Pacifier
With your toddler’s language skills developing, having a pacifier often in her mouth can be frustrating. While it won’t harm her, you might want to limit its use to certain times of the day, like naptime. For strategies on helping your child give up the pacifier completely, check out our top ten tips for weaning off the pacifier.
Childproofing Check
As your child’s second birthday approaches, it’s a good time to reassess your childproofing efforts. Each developmental stage brings new hazards as your child grows taller, more mobile, and more adventurous. Your toddler may now be able to climb onto stools, tables, and counters; open containers that previously didn’t interest them; and access dangerous areas (like a pool or a basement tool bench) faster than you might think.
The good news is that your child can now understand “no.” While moving dangers out of reach is still important, you should also start using clear verbal instructions and a serious tone to communicate unacceptable behaviors, like touching sharp objects or ripping books.
Continue to keep potential threats out of reach. Remove sharp knives from accessible drawers and store medications and vitamins in childproof containers. For more detailed guidance, read about childproofing your house.
Social and Emotional Development
Clinginess
If your previously adventurous child has suddenly become clingy, you might wonder what’s happening. At this age, a toddler’s imagination can sometimes lead to new fears. He might be afraid that the vacuum cleaner could swallow him like it does small toys, or that he could go down the drain with the bath water. These fears might seem irrational to you, but for a child beginning to explore independence, they are very real.
How to handle this: Acknowledge his fears rather than dismissing them: “I know the water goes down the drain, but look – I can’t even fit my hand in the drain.” Talk to him about what’s upsetting him. Remember, your toddler has a vivid imagination and a limited vocabulary, so it’s up to you to interpret what’s going on.
When you need to leave him, continue your usual routine. Always say goodbye, explain where you’re going, and who will be taking care of him. If possible, involve him in an activity with the sitter before you leave.
Looking Up to Big Kids
Your toddler might be interested in playing with other children and imitating them. If he has an older sibling, he may follow them around, trying to dribble a basketball, wrestle, or join a game of tag. He might offer his sibling cookies or prized possessions to win their affection and entertain them with funny faces.
Consider having duplicates of favorite toys to minimize arguments over sharing. You don’t need two of everything, but if your toddler loves trucks, ensure there’s one for him and one for his sibling to play side by side.
Schedule playdates at times when your toddler is well-rested and in a good mood. If he usually naps from 1 to 3 p.m., avoid a noon gathering. Keep playdates short, about 30 to 60 minutes, to avoid overstimulation. For more tips, check out ideas on how to make playdates go smoothly.
Learning to Talk About Feelings
Toddlers have feelings too, and they are just starting to learn how to express them. You can nurture your child’s emotional intelligence (EQ) by teaching him words that reflect his feelings, both positive and negative: “I see that you’re sad because we have to leave the park now,” or “You get angry when your brother won’t share his trucks with you.” Help him understand that it’s okay to have conflicting emotions, like feeling both nervous and excited about a new tumbling class.
If your toddler has started referring to himself by his name or using the pronoun “I,” this indicates he understands he is a separate person from you. Build his self-confidence by praising specific achievements rather than general statements like “What a good boy you are.” Instead, focus on specifics such as, “I really like the way you made that tower.”
Parenting
Discipline Disagreements
It’s common for couples to have differing opinions on parenting. Each person brings their own personality and ideas to the table.
When you and your partner disagree on how to handle a parenting situation, it’s crucial for your child’s well-being that you present a united front. The parent who witnessed the incident should respond as they see fit. Discuss your disagreement privately, away from your toddler.
Consistency is key to effective discipline. It’s helpful to discuss your fundamental views on rules and consequences and find common ground on major issues. Rather than criticizing each other’s methods, explain your approaches and why you believe they work. Focus on specific issues and seek compromise.
Recording Memories
Looking for a precious keepsake from your child’s early years? Consider starting a quote book. As your child becomes more verbal, they may say some amusing things. Toddlers often ask intriguing questions (“Hi, Mommy, are you awake?”), make observations based on their limited vocabularies (“Grandpa’s hair all gone!”), and use metaphors in charming ways (“moon cracker” for a crescent-shaped bite).
While many sophisticated expressions may not emerge until around age 2 when language skills rapidly develop, jotting down funny remarks now can create a wonderful record. We often assume we’ll remember these moments, but many fade over time.
